TO THE BACK. A limo arrives. It's GOLDBERG! BUT WHO WAS LIMO?!?! Why is he even here? He has no match. Showing up at the start of the show is very out of character for him.
Glacier vs Wrath
Fuck. That's not a good start to the show at all. How does Glacier get a singles match on PPV? Especially one with zero build to a guy who destroyed him with ease a few shows ago. Glacier does a lot of stalling, then gets sent to the floor a few times. He gets thrown over the railing and they brawl in the crowd briefly. This is just a long, boring squash. Cryonic kick to the shoulder area. That was the only offense Glacier got in a 10 minute match. He attempted the Asiatic spike, which was blocked and countered into the Meltdown.
Stevie Ray vs Konnan
Ugh. Konnan wouldn't stop punching Stevie, so the ref disqualified him. Booker came out and politely asked him to stop. He helped his brother up. Stevie was mad about it. He shoved Book off and left with Virgil.
Sonny Onoo/The Cat vs Saturn/Kaz Hayashi
I swore there was only one "o" at the end of Onoo, but I guess not. Sonny is wearing a gi and has a cut man with him. Cat does his 5 count for Kaz only to turn around into Saturn. Kaz gets back in and is dominated by Cat. Sonny gets tagged in. He hits some kicks. They piss Kaz off. Sonny pulls out a wad of cash, gets kicked, then scurries to make the tag. Saturn tags in. After taking Saturn down, Cat forces Sonny in. He isn't very excited about it. His first kick gets caught and turned into an STF. Cat gets back in to get things under control. Sonny hits a series of kicks on Kaz in the corner. Kaz catches the last one. Cat kicks Kaz in the back of the head (allegedly). Saturn attempted to suplex Sonny. Cat kicks him in the face. He falls on Saturn and wins. Shouldn't Sonny have pinned Kaz, since this feud is actually about those two?
Kidman vs Juventud Guerrera WCW Cruiserweight Championship
God damn it. This PPV is awful. Rey should be getting a title shot anyway. Gene ran up to Juvi before the match. It is revealed that Juvi has joined the LWO. Rey came out to argue with Eddie. Not even switching rings could make the 12th match between these two interesting to me. Rey held Kidman in place while Juvi went for a super rana. SSP for the win. New champion. Again. The LWO come out. Rey throws his shirt and runs away.
Scott Steiner vs Rick Steiner
TO THE BACK. The nWo were beating on Rick. Giant brought him to the ring.
I'm not even sure if this is a real match. Rick's right arm looks dead. He punches the nWo ref. Goldberg runs in. Scott initially just brushes him off. Spear. Buff tried to hit Goldberg with a chair, mostly missed, and bailed. The nWo ref got thrown into another ring. No contest, I guess.
Scott Hall vs Kevin Nash
All of the B-Team came out with Hall. Bischoff came out moments later. He has the B-Team attack Hall. Nash came out for the save. The crowd chanted "Outsiders". Hall offered the hand sign. Nash left. No contest, I guess.
Bobby Duncum Jr. vs Chris Jericho WCW TV Championship
Jericho gets a slap in the mouth. He bails to the protection and warm embrace of Ralphus. I thought Ralphus was funny at the time, but now I feel like it was really mean spirited and I'm not sure he was even in on it. It got worse when he was with Norman. Duncum hits a lariatoo and settles into a chin lock. Big boot. It goes to the floor. Jericho gets thrown into everything. Duncum tries to take a shirt from a fan and can't. Jericho does a lariatoo off the railing. It gets back in the ring and he hits a missile dropkick. Duncum comes back with a shoulder breaker. Stun gun and a triangle dropkick sends it back to the floor. Duncum comes out of the corner with another lariatoo. Chokebomb from Duncum. Lionsault. Superplex. Ralphus tried to interfere. Didn't really work. However, Duncum going after him was a distraction to the ref and allowed Jericho to use the title for the win.
World War 3
Winner gets a title shot against Goldberg at Starrcade. Benoit got a big pop. Barry Darsow debuted his golf outfit. Buddy Lee Parker was the only guy in the match who hadn't been on Nitro or Thunder this year. That's disappointing. I was hoping for some completely bottom of the barrel jobbers or random territory guys. Bam Bam hopped the railing near the end. Everyone stopped to fight him. Goldberg ran out and security pulled them apart on the floor. Nash won by eliminating Hall and Luger at the same time. A 20 minute battle royal for 60 men. The Royal Rumble has 30 people and goes at least an hour. It took about 10 minutes just for intros.
Bret Hart vs DDP WCW US Championship
A year after Survivor Series, this is Bret's first WCW PPV main event. Unless you count War Games, which you shouldn't. DDP starts the match with a pescado. He unleashed an ass kicking in the ring and floor until Bret slows it down. DDT. Bret slips out of a Kanyon Cutter. It goes to the floor again for a bit. Bret weirdly tries a tombstone just so it can be reversed. I bet he'd try to powerbomb Kidman, too. Bret pretty much no sells it and continues his 5MOD. DDP comes back with a belly to belly. Discuss this lariatoo. Pancake Norton. Back to the floor again. DDP locks on probably the worst Sharpshooter of all time. Worse than Rock's and Trish's combined. Bret hits a low blow right in front of the ref. There is no way he didn't see it. This allows Bret to start working over the legs. Ring post figure four. But the Sharpshooter works the back, not the legs. It always bothered me when he'd do matches to work over the legs to set up the Sharpshooter. It goes to the floor AGAIN. DDP does the ring post figure four. He gets a chair in the ring. The ref won't allow him to use it, but Bret bumped them into each other. He got an international object. He decked DDP. The nWo ref called for the bell. It rang and they gave him the belt. New champion! A second ref says no fucking way. DDP gets up and hits a Kanyon Cutter. BANG! Same champion!
What a shitty show. This has to be up there for one of the worst PPVs of any era. Road Wild was awful, but this was pathetic. You expect Road Wild to be a waste of a show with at least an interesting visual presentation. This was just bad. Wrath vs Glacier, Stevie Ray vs Konnan, Sonny Onoo in a match and winning, a 22 minute battle royal for 60 men, the 11th Kidman vs Juvi match, two matches that didn't even start. Not even an 18 minute DDP/Bret match could save the show, since it wasn't that good, either. Just shamelessly bad. This is an event that had 2 run ins in a battle royal. Get the fuck outta here.