WWF Unforgiven: In Your House 4/26/98

 

 

Nation of Domination vs Ken Shamrock/Faarooq/Steve Blackman

Rock is now the leader of the Nation and has to deal with Team TMF.  Perhaps he made a mistake.  D'Lo and Blackman start the match. If you added Bradshaw to Team TMF, it might be THE most Team TMF in WWF history. Some mean mother fuckers on that side of the ring. Faarooq comes in, hits a spine buster and then starts whipping the shit out of D'Lo. Like a government mule, if you will.  I wish Team TMF were better wrestlers, though. Rock is so over. I can't believe they waited until the end of the year to give him the title. It's weird seeing Mark Henry moving around so fast. I'm so used to him moving like a cruise ship. It's THE PEOPLE'S ELBOW!  Faarooq gets a tag and goes HAM on the whole Nation. It was pretty dope. Dominator! Faarooq pins Rock! It wasn't a very good match, but I always enjoy watching Rock and D'Lo, and it is dope whenever Faarooq gets pissed and starts whopping ass. Cole got a post-match interview with Faarooq, who says this is the start of whopping Rock's ass.


Steve Austin comes to the ring. He drags the time keeper into the ring. Austin promises to beat his ass if Vince screws him out of the title tonight.


Triple H vs Owen Hart WWF European Championship

Chyna is in a shark cage held above the ring for this match due to her constant interference. Maybe WWF officials should stop letting her come to the ring. Owen attacks HHH on the floor and bounces him all around ringside. HHH gets back into with the high knee.  THE HINEY. FUCKING BOOTY MAN. HHH rocks a dragon sleeper for a bit. I forgot about him using that move for a while in 1998. Chyna is able to bend the bars of the cage. Then she WAY jumps her cue to get involved, escapes, and Owen stands around like an asshole as she hangs from the cage. Then it finally starts to lower. Refs and Sarge grab her and pull her away from the ring. Pedigree...from Owen! X-Pac hits Owen with a fire extinguisher while officials are busy with Chyna.  HHH wins. Title retained. Cole got some words with Owen after the match. "Enough is enough. This bullshit has gotta stop."


Rock 'n' Roll Express vs New Midnight Express NWA World Tag Team Championships

Bob and Gibson begin the match. If there was ever a place that should be hot for this match, it'd be the Greensboro Colosseum. But they're silent for the RNRs.  Midnights can't get along and have a lot of miscommunications. Corny Cunt has to pull them apart. Corny and Tim White have a face off.  This shit is SO out of place in the Attitude Era.  This is a match straight out of 1987. But it is 1998 and that shit isn't working for these people. Bart got the win after Bob hit a sneaky bulldog on Gibson. Titles retained.


TO THE CUNT. Dok is with Luna and Goldust. Luna is going to strip Sable nekkid!


Luna vs Sable Evening Gown Match

Completely pointless. Luna wins. They could have just had Sable come out half naked and walk around the ring or something. Sable apparently stripped Luna completely naked under the ring.


Mr. McMahon and the stooges come to the ring. Vince says something catastrophic will happen tonight. He's not here to screw Stone Cold. Instead, he's there because he's actually a native North Carolinian.  He will not be responsible for anything that happens tonight if Stone Cold screws Stone Cold.

TO THE HERMIE. Kevin is speaking with Sable for the WWF Hotline.



New Age Outlaws vs LOD 2000 WWF Tag Team Championships

The Outlaws are managed by a blow up doll dressed as Dean Smith.  Dogg says that every time they have a match with LOD, they end up on top with the LOD on bottom, but that isn't his sexual preference. So..Road Dogg is a bottom?  Slightly changing your gear and getting flat tops isn't helping, guys. They're still the same old LOD, doing the same old LOD match. In a way, the repackaging just reinforced that LOD were old and out of touch. This is not interesting at all and again a team that should be over huge in this building gets very little heat. The times they are a'changin'. Hawk pins Roadie with a German suplex. But then it is announced that Hawk had his shoulders down on the pin. Even though Roadie's shoulders absolutely never came off the mat. Someone fucked up. Titles retained. Jack Doan got attacked after the match.


Tennessee Lee introduces Sawyer Brown, with Jeff Jarrett singing on back up. NWA shit stops and Jeff immediately brings back his old gimmick that had been BERRIED both on WWF and WCW television. And the band is definitely playing to a backing track. This is awful. After the song, Steve Blackman arrives and attempts to break Jeff's arms. Col. Parker drills him with a guitar. A figure four is put on a lifeless Blackman. This gets WE WANT FLAIR chants. One of the worst segments in WWF history.


Kane vs Undertaker Inferno Match

JR gets all pissy with King for making bad puns and then says, "The heated rivalry...". You mother fucker. I wonder what the kayfabe reason for the flames shooting up after/during big bumps. This is boring as shit. It's a slow paced big man match with flames that shoot up once in a while to make you think something cool just happened.  But it didn't. Nothing about this is cool. Eventually, after all this slow and plodding bullshit, Kane gets thrown over the top rope. He tries to leave, but is met by Vader in the aisle. Taker then does a tope onto both of them and Vader calmly leaves, his spotful duty being finished. Taker chases Paul up to the band stage and puts his head through the bass drum. Some Loony Toons shit. Paul bladed for it. Kane's arm gets knocked into the fire, so Taker wins. Over booked, stupid bullshit. And this is supposed to be the best Inferno Match.  It sucks. It's a terrible gimmick. There is no such thing as a good inferno match.


Dude Love vs Steve Austin WWF Championship

The Dudester attacks before the bell. Piece of shit.  LOU THESZ LOU THESZ RIGHT HAND RIGHT HAND. Dude tries to run away. Austin blasts him in the back of the head with a lariato and the match heads to the band stage. Foley gets hip tossed off of it. Just splatting on the floor. Once it gets back to the ring, Austin misses the flying tea bag on the ropes and Dude gets back in control. Austin responds with a full sprint lariato. That's the 3rd one of the match from him I believe. Vince and the Stooges stroll out. The Stooges are here just to open a chair for Vince and then they leave. Is Vince going to screw Austin?  Vince gets very excited at seeing Austin get knocked around on the floor and gets out of his chair to shit talk. Austin chases him, but it appears to be a set up for Dude to ambush him. Vince says to RING THE FUCKING BELL, but the time keeper wasn't looking at him. Lol.  Austin suplexes Foley tail bone first into the corner of the ring steps. That looked hurty as fuck. Shin Music is countered. Stunner is countered. Spinning lariat is countered into a ref bump. Mandible claw! Austin drills Vince in the head with a chair, then hits the stunner in the ring. He counts his own pin and his music plays so it must be official. Vince is apparently dead. Stone Cold was disqualified for hitting a WWF official. Dude Love wins! EMTs attend to a lifeless Vince to end the show. Mick definitely died for his company and his champion.


 

Definitely another one match show, which is pretty normal during the Attitude Era. Austin/Dude was a ton of fun, though. And Vince was wonderful at ringside.  The rest of the show is entirely skippable, although seeing Faarooq knock the shit out of the nation was fun, even if the rest of the match wasn't.

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