WWF Monday Night Raw 11/15/93

Randy Savage has been SUSPENDED from ringside. He's too volatile right now. 

Razor Ramon vs Brooklyn Brawler WWF Intercontinental Championship

Much to Razor's chagrin, HBK has been reinstated, and he's replacing Jerry Lawler at the Survivor Series. While no on screen reason was given, the real reason was that Jerry Lawler was charged with raping a 15 year old girl. Eventually, the charges were dropped as the girl admitted to fabricating SOME of the story. This didn't stop King and JR from making creepy young girl jokes for the rest of their careers together. So HBK, who probably wasn't going to be brought back for a while after, was brought back to replace him against the the Harts in a blood feud that he has nothing to do with. The Brooklyn Brawler getting a competitive title match in 1993. The fuck? Razor's Edge mercifully ends this flirtation of the Brawler as a champion. Title retained. 

Crush cuts a promo talking mad shit to Randy Savage, bruddah. If Macho gets in his way, he'll lose a lot more than his commentator job, brah.

Bret Hart will finally get his rematch against Yokozuna THIS SUNDAY at the Survivor Series Showdown.

Headshrinkers vs Mike Bucci/Mike Maraldo

These Mike and Ikes are about to get destroyed. Shockingly, they actually get some offense and have Fatu reeling at one point. Samu didn't play with that shit, though. After winning, Fatu thinks about eating Nova's boots. The fuck? 

TO THE SUPERSTARS. Lex and the Steiners confirm that Tatanka will no longer be on the All Americans team at the Survivor Series, but they did reveal their NEW partner...THE UNDERTAKER! Taker more or less reveals himself to be a Libertarian who has been around since the founding of the country. "So let, let freedom ring, and let these Foreign Fanatics REST IN PEACE." Taker reveals the inside of his coat to be lined with a Betsy Ross American flag. It's almost like you could say he's an American Bad Ass.

Pierre vs Lex Luger

Lex was voted in by the WWF Universe, although Vince did a hard sell multiple times to make sure people would pick Lex. And I have to assume it was going to be Lex regardless of the votes since the show was taped in advance, so all those people that voted for anyone really got fleeced out of their 99 cents per minute. Of course, Pierre bumps as much as he possibly can for Lex. His offense only come after interference from Raven. This match goes on way longer than it probably should (what seemed like 3 commercials) and ends with Lex winning via his loaded forearm. Pierre actually did a stretcher job for it.

Pierre piledriver to Lex Luger.gif

Diesel vs Sid Garrison

Omg, a Planet of the Apes marathon this Friday on USA! Diesel easily won with a big boot and elbow drop.

TO THE SURVIOR SERIES REPORT. Fuck Todd. Bitch, you ain't telling me anything I don't already know. Wearing a plaid blazer with a SS TV shirt. Fuck you. You think I can't tell you're wearing shoulder pads? Mother fucker. This includes footage of Doink fucking with Bastion Booger on Superstars. 

To end the show, we see Double J in his personal recording studio with Wynonna, otherwise known as Miss Jacqueline in her WWF debut years before she actually debuted. Jeff has had 25 auditions today and none of them have been good enough, so Jeff will have to play every instrument himself. To get to the top of the country music business. And I guess the WWF, but mostly the country music business, as that's his main focus. 


I thought things couldn't get worse than weekly Bastion Booger segments and matches, but the Double J vignettes are the fucking WORST.