WWF Smackdown 6/28/01
Not only did WCW invade the KOTR, they also invaded Madison Square Garden, stealing the WWF Hardcore Championship, and attacking Vince. SD is also from MSG, and the show starts with Vince coming to the ring in an extra pissy mood. MSG is now forever unclean. "Madison Square Garden used to be the most famous arena in the world. Hell, it might as well be the Nassau County Colosseum." Lmao. It's kind of weird how WCW was portrayed as the face faction at the start here. You can't tell your audience that WCW is the enemy and sucks for years, then expect that same audience to cheer for that same group as they come in and sneak attack WWF guys they like. Vince invites WCW to an ass kicking tonight, which brings out Linda McMahon to the sweet ass WM music. She knows Vince didn't mean what he said about MSG, then plays a clip of Vince asking for a divorce in the building last year. Vince has changed! "And you know that, somewhere down deep, you know that I care very much for you, and that I still...I still...............love you." "What was that, Vince?" "You heard what I said." Lol. What does any of this have to do with WWF vs WCW? Linda says that, in the interest of fairness, Vince will allow WCW matches to happen on Raw and Smackdown starting Monday. Linda then announces that instead of Fully Loaded at the end of July, we'll get a WCW vs WWF PPV called INVASION.
TO THE BACK. The APA calls a meeting in the WWF locker room. They hype up the roster to watch all the doors and fight when they see anyone from WCW. Again, half the people in the room came directly from WCW or ECW. Including a former WCW hampion, a former WCW Hardcore hampion, multiple WCW tag team champions, multiple WCW US champions, and a former WCW Cruiserweight champion.
Edge & Christian vs Billy Gunn/X-Pac
This seems pretty random. Do we not remember X-Pac and Billy being on opposite sides of the DX split? Billy Bitchcakes was worse than Rock's ether promo for Billy. I'll never understand why WWF/E would have dudes cut promos just shitting all over guys, then expecting you to take those guys seriously afterwards. Edge pins X-Pac with the Impaler/Buzzkiller in a very short match. Lol at Christian celebrating with the KOTR trophy.
TO THE BACK. Stone Cold and Debra talk about Booker T. Austin would have beat that ass if Booker had actually been at WWF New York. Vince comes in. Austin sees Invasion as a way to get his hands on Booker. Austin also thinks Vince should have WCW matches on WWF TV. He explains why...in a whisper. The implication is that WWF guys will have the opportunity to attack WCW guys in those matches.
TO THE BACK. Spike and Molly flirt, when Saturn shows up to say weird brain damaged shit. Crash shows up to shit on short people like Spike, despite being shorter than Spike. Crash and Jackie have challenged them to a mixed tag tonight.
There is a recap of Taker/Sara and DDP on Raw, which leads directly into an interview with them and and JR. This stuff is so weird. Calling Taker "Mark", and Taker's bizarre "I'm not comfortable with this" acting.
TO THE BACK. Vince is with Austin and Debra, saying he could probably beat Booker's ass himself. Kurt Angle shows up to wonder about Austin/Booker crossing paths. Rumor is that Booker T is in the building. Vince and Austin want some of Booker.
Kane vs Albert WWF Intercontinental Championship
Albert has been fucking with Kane for weeks now. Is this the blow off match? Tazz apologizes for not being around last week to defend Cole against Austin. "Albert's a moose, a monster; he's an animal!" Albert nearly wins after using the ring bell on the floor. Then Kane does HURRICANRANA to Albert in the ring. I mean, he landed on his own head, but whatever. Kane just did a rana. Kane hits the chokeslam, but DDP shows up to hit a (terrible) Kanyon Cutter OUTTA NOWHERE. Albert follows that with the Baldo Bomb. New champion!
TO THE BACK. Vince blames all of this on Undertaker. Lol at Austin just staring down Angle while Vince talks. "Where there's DDP, there's bound to be Booker T." "That's an old expression?" "No, I just made it up." Lol.
Hardy Boys vs Dudley Boys Elimination Table Match
How many Dudleys/Hardys matches can we get? Making it a gimmick match doesn't change things. Cole talks about Jeff being an eligible bachelor, which is pretty weird. This is both teams running through their normal spots together. I wonder how many matches these guys have had in various forms. Jeff puts D-Von through a table with a swanton, and almost immediately after, Bubba backdrops him out of the ring through two tables. Just then, WCW Tag Team Champions Sean O'Haire and Chuck Palumbo INVADE. The mid card shows up, and the Thrillers run out. But then, the REST of the mid card catches them at the side door and beat the every loving shit out of them. Lol. Mind you, at the start of the show, WCW were shown to be the faces in this situation, but now you have about 15 guys beating the dog shit out of the WCW tag team champions in MSG to massive roars. Get your fucking messaging straight.
DURING THE BREAK. The beating continue and the Thrillers were literally thrown out on the street.
Crash Holly/Jacqueline vs Spike Dudley/Molly Holly
Jackie immediately attacks Molly. Count how many times you hear "Tough Enough" during this match. This is intergender, not a mixed tag, so the men and women fight. And Jackie beats the shit out of Spike. Molly pins Jackie with the Molly-Go-Round, which really does not seem like a well thought out move to me. Crash got in Jackie's face after the match and got knocked on his ass.
TO THE BACK. Kurt Angle makes a tale of the tape list for a hypothetical Booker/Austin match. Dave Hebner comes in to say someone from WCW is here to meet Vince. Vince, after all of his shit talk, is nervous to go meet this person, who they assume is Booker T. Instead, it's Torrie Wilson. SWERVE. Kurt smoothly hits on her. Torrie is looking to defect as her WCW contract is just about up. As she flirts with Vince, Austin makes sure to get in there to hug him to remind him of their relationship. Lol. Vince is making the classic "Come on, man" face.
TO THE OFFICE. Regal's face is still stained green from Tajiri's mist. Jericho comes in and challenges the two to a tag match.
Big Show vs Perry Saturn
This was made during the break as Big Show spilled water on Trish, then tried to clean it up with a mop. Saturn tried to take the mop, because it was his mop, and Show broke it. Will Saturn get more brain trauma tonight? He does seem more lucid than normal, what with his mop-based rage. Terri and Trish get into a catfight, with allows Show to hit the chokeslam for the win.
TO THE BACK. The midcard is still guarding the doors.
William Regal/Tajiri vs Chris Jericho/Scotty 2 Hotty
SCOTTY IS BACK! Forgot he was gone. Kurt broke his ankle and he's been gone for months. Tajiri is very confused with Scotty. We all are, really. Jericho and Regal have no chemistry, I don't know why they keep getting paired together. But just remember, Jericho was wrestling for the WWF Championship just weeks ago. Now he's being used as an excuse to get Scotty 2 Hotty a return pop. Scotty pins Tajiri with the worm. Tajiri should have misted him on the way down.
TO THE BACK. Austin is sick of hearing about Booker, so he's going to call Booker out like a man. Kurt won't go out with him, because Steve Austin is Stone Cold Steve Austin. He doesn't need any help. Lol at Kurt mind fucking Austin into getting his ass kicked.
Austin comes to the ring and calls Booker out. He gives Booker 10 seconds to come out. Booker doesn't show, but Tazz does get in the ring. "Unless Booker T got real short and real fat, real fast, you ain't no Booker T." Lol. Tazz is pretty hot about that beating Cole got last week. He wants Austin to apologize. Tazz threatens to beat an apology out of Austin, and for the title. RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. Austin agrees to put the title on the line against him anytime, anywhere. Except tonight. Then he beats Tazz's ass. He torments Michael Cole until Booker runs in and hits him with the WCW Championship. The midcard chases Booker away.
TO THE BACK. Booker and Shane peel away in their limo before the locker room can get them.
I really enjoy the Austin/Kurt/Vince stuff. Still makes me laugh. The Invasion stuff, though, man that shit was borked from day one. WCW is simultaneously a group of outsiders invading and attacking the WWF on WWF TV, while also being scrappy underdogs just trying to get TV time to combat the evil Vince McMahon and his evil empire. While Shane is the big face running the ship, he's sending in guys like DDP to stalk Taker's wife, and his champions ruining WWF title matches and being heels. On the other side, Vince is both the evil heel and also the magnanimous face owner who has made this whole thing possible to begin with, who oscillates between normal heel promos on the crowd and rallying cries for his company designed to get face pops. You have the midcard, led by the APA portrayed as valiant warriors defending their territory for face pops, while Linda is out there saying how the WCW guys just want to work and fans want to see them.
It's not like they're trying to tell a deep, nuanced story here. It's just shitty writing.