WCW Thunder 1/15/98
Tenay is the lead announcer with partners who don’t give a fuck about their jobs, on a Thursday wrasslin show with a blue color scheme, and featuring Hulk Hogan, Sting, and Eric Bischoff? I have the weirdest sense of deja vu right now.
Show starts with a recap of the lawyer mumbo jumbo between Nash and Giant on Nitro.
TO THE SCHIAVONE. Tony is in the ring and brings out The Giant. Lodi walks around ringside with a sign that says “Nash rules, Giant Drools” He gets chokeslammed. So does everyone else. Kidman gets press slammed into the front row. Nash comes out and gets in Giant’s face. He even throws hot coffee in Shoe’s face.
Recap of nWo problems from Nitro.
Black Cat/Ohara/Gedo vs Steiner Brothers/Ray Traylor
I have a feeling Scott is going to kill someone in this match. Before Gedo was the Rain Taker, he was a fat dude who wrestled in pajamas. We’re informed that DDP was mugged after Nitro and may be unable to compete. Boss Man and Black Cat start off. Not a lot going on here. This is classic random WCW. There should have been a WAR/WCW supercard to see who could have the most random matches. Tracking issues make it hard to gif Scott trying to kill these poor Japanese folks. Scott destroys all 3 men and pins Gedo with the Screwdriver without tagging his brother once. Scott shoves the ref again, even after getting a fine for it last week.
Yuji Nagata vs Ernest Miller
WCW is thinking about starting a martial arts division, though contested under pro wrestling rules. Cat kicks Yuji in the face right away. It’s weird seeing Cat come out to generic rock music. Belly to belly from Nagata. It looks like he got full mount was was dropping elbows, but the tracking again is pretty rough. It feels like some guy in a Max Headroom mask is going to pop up on screen any second. Cat hit a pretty cool leg sweep. The Feliner was not a finisher yet. Actually, he does one off the top in the style of the Merosault and calls that the Feliner and it gets him the win.
TO THE SCHIAVONE. Tony is with JJ. JJ is making an announcement about DDP, but the mic died. DDP hobbles out on crutches. JJ won’t allow DDP to wrestle without signing a release. DDP has no problem with that. I had a problem with JJ mouthing all of DDP’s promo, though. I see that shit all the time and it blows my mind every time. You can’t keep track of the promo in your head?
Louie Spicolli vs Scott Hall
Hall is now wearing the current and original WCW Tag Team Championships. Hall asks Louie how old he is. Louie says he’s 26, but will be 27 next month. Louie would die exactly a month later. Larry comes out to tell the kid not to be friends with Hall. God damn if that isn’t some prescient advice. Louie then ambushed Larry, but Larry disposes of both men.
Chris Jericho vs Eddie Guerrero
More apologies. The winner of this will face the winner of Juvi vs Rey. Jericho does a press slam Hot Shot. I don’t remember Jericho press slamming dudes, but he has two shows in a row. A drop kick to the knee slows him down. Eddie tries the Gory Special and more or less hits a Vertebreaker. Eddie tried a rana out of the corner and gets caught in the Liontamer. Way too short.
Recap of the Anvil/Flair confrontation. Technical difficulties means we only hear the audio for most of it and instead get to see a live shot of the crowd for 2 minutes.
Chavo Guerrero Jr vs Bill Goldberg
Hopefully Chavo has better luck than his uncle. Disco Inferno came out instead of Goldberg. He says no one came to see Chavo wrestle. Chavo reads him the riot act, but again technical difficulties prevent anything from being seen. It’s back to now a still shot of the audience. I guess there was a bad storm that night.
After the break, Tenay apologizes for the video difficulties. We’re then shown a recap of the title being vacated.
Hogan and Bischoff come to the ring, but thunderstorms are killing Thunder. It’s like Bret Screwed Bret. Hogan is saying some weird shit. Something about sticking his Harley in the ocean with a hippy and palm tree in each hand, looking up to the big nWo-ite in the sky. Wat. The point is he wants JJ to give him the title on Nitro.
Rey Mysterio Jr. vs Juventud Guerrera WCW Cruiserweight Championship
Let’s hope the storms don’t ruin this match. Action starts right away with a lot of spinny stuff, ending with a head scissors that sends Juvi to the floor. Rey follows up with a flipping plancha and sells his knee. They get back in the ring. Juvi does a slingshot to the floor and then hits a crazy far dive that the storm cuts out right in the middle of, but he got way out there for it. Muscle buster! Monkey flip on the apron sends Juvi into the ring post. But somehow he goes on the offense and hits a slingshot leg drop from the ring to the floor. He his a springboard dropkick back in the ring. Crowd is completely dead for this. But to be fair, the whole point of the match is that Rey is injured. Unprettier! Pin reversal sequence. Juvi goes for a powerbomb, but Rey fights out and lands a senton. Tornado DDT from Rey is reversed. Juvi goes for a superplex, which is also reversed. Rey then goes for a diving rana only to get caught in a powerbomb. 450 is dodged, but Juvi landed on his feet, only for Rey to snap of a quick rana for the win. New champion! Rey vs Jericho will happen at Souled Out.
Recap of Liz setting up Lex for an ambush on Nitro. Maybe that’s why Lex KILLED HER!
Kevin Nash/Randy Savage vs DDP/Lex Luger
Lex convinces DDP to go and stay in the back. DDP goes back and then gets on the apron, where Hogan takes him down and bends a crutch over the bad knee. Savage won’t tag Nash until Hogan makes him, and it is a feisty tag. When Savage doesn’t get out of the ring, Nash throws him out. Nash slaps Savage to tag out. Hogan is doing his best to keep the two together and it isn’t working very well. Lex takes Nash and Macho out and then puts Hulk in the torture rack. He then puts Nash in the Rack. Macho went up top to ax handle Nash, but Lex dropped him and took the move himself. Okay. Hulk accidentally kicks Savage. They argue and Hogan gets pushed into The Giant. Chokeslam on Hogan. More video problems, but it sounds like the rest of the nWo hit the ring to fight off The Giant. It’s STING! We’re outta time!