WCW Thunder 10/14/99
LolThunder. Kevin Nash has joined the broadcast team to bury everything on his last night as booker. The very first thing he says is that people have said he was a bad booker, but he booked himself in the best angle of all time (retirement angle), and now they've placed him on the announce team to recoup some of those funds. When asked where Hall was, he said that he hasn't seen Hall since he had 2 girls for sushi.
Buddy Lee Parker vs Jim Duggan
This is such a Saturday Night 1995 match. Sadly, Nash was pretty quiet for this match. Duggan wins with the Old Glory knee drop. Nash wants to know where Tenay gets the names for moves from.
Al Greene vs Lash LeRoux
Nash sings Al Greene songs before mentioning that the wrestler Al Greene was his second tag team partner. Lash gets a Cruiserweight Championship shot at Havoc. Lash was noted to have the sweetest side burns as voted by WCW fans. It seems the announce team had a debate on the Van Dyke facial hair style before the show. Also, Dean Malenko is actually Jerry from the Dick Van Dyke show. Lash easily wins with the Whiplash.
Recap of Knobs vs Stevie from Nitro. Apparently, there are actual angles going on on Saturday Night. Crazy. Next week's Thunder will have Lex vs Buff.
The Total Package and Liz come to the ring. Nash and Larry talk about Liz's tits. Lex blames the fans for the death of Lex Luger. He didn't get any get well soon cards while he was out hurt. "The Old Glory Torture Rack." Buff comes out. "That much airbrush should be against the law." Buff called Lex while he was hurt. And now, Buff wants to know what the deal with Lex and Sting is. Buff challenges Lex to a match that was announced just before this segment. Rick Steiner came out and Buff got double teamed before....LA PARKA made the save. Little known fact: Lex Luger is terrified of skeletons.
Recap of Kidman likely boning Torrie over the past couple weeks.
The Armstrong Brothers vs The First Family
Nash dropped a Bull Nakano reference, which gave Tenay a nerd boner. Old Glory moonsault for the win. Knobs called Harlem Heat out after the match. They came out. "That's not Booker T, that's Wesley Snipes! No, that is Booker T."
Recap of Revolution problems from Nitro. Nash made a video package narrated over Sid and Goldberg trash talking. It's amazing. Nash wants to know how a guy from Detroit (Rick Steiner) ended up sounding like a Southern redneck.
Horace vs Brian Adams
Old Glory mule kick from Horace. No mention of these guys being in the nWo together. No mention of the nWo at all. Crush wins with his shitty piledriver.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Lash LeRoux? Lol. Lash shouldn't be allowed to do promos.
Recap of the Armstrong/Berlyn angle.
"What's with me doing a job in the commercial?"
TAFKATAFKAPI vs Berlyn
Nash more or less says that La Parka got booked in the main event because so many people no showed and that's who was left. This leads Tenay saying it is an all SHOOT, all the time edition of Thunder. Nash claims The Big Shizzow is coming to TBS. It's a wrestling variety show featuring Hall, Nash, and a colleague. Nash is getting old and doesn't want to be bumping around any more. Old Glory Samoan drop. Old Glory German neckbreaker for the win.
A Meng hype video that had a random plug for the WCW hotline on top of the package for the first few seconds. Which is great since this show was edited for days before it aired on TV.
Luther Biggs vs Meng
Nash sings Barry White, implies that Meng IS Barry White, and Larry called Biggs "Riggs". Deathgrip for the win. Coach Glacier also got put in the Deathgrip. "These guys should know, no one gets beat after a sweet package like that."
Saturn vs Rey Mysterio Jr.
Halloween Havoc is Nash's favorite show because he gets to see his stripper friends. Old Glory Ruff Ryder! Larry started getting into it and continuing the Old Glory running joke. He's now Bruno. Nash actually got kind of serious for this match and started marking out for MOVEZ. Rey won with a roll up OUTTA NOWHERE. Saturn laid out the ref and Rey after the match.
Rick Steiner/Total Package vs Buff Bagwell/La Parka
Bagwell did an Old Glory choke on the floor. "I root for heels." The finish was La Parka getting his chair out and Buff hitting him with the Blockbuster for no reason. There was actual finish. No pins, no count outs, no DQs. Just Buff hitting his move on his partner and then the show ended.
DQ Count: 0 out of 8 matches.
Nash was great. It was still Thunder, though. The next Nitro should be amazing. Russo wasn't supposed to take over until Halloween Havoc, but the start date got moved up to the Nitro before Havoc. I'm pumped.