WCW Mayhem 11/21/99
Tonight we will crown a new WCW Champion after the title was vacated because Sting attacked a ref after a match. I'll get into the tournament a little more once we get to the finals. This is also the first WCW PPV from Canada.
Jeff Jarrett vs Chris Benoit Tournament Semi Final
Jeff has his Kid Rock entrance music now. You know, despite being the chosen one, Jeff really hasn't been doing much in the past month. He had a mini feud with Buff and that's about it. Benoit hits a tornado DDT in the opening seconds. He has a maple leaf on his tights like a fucking suck up. Superplex. It goes to the floor. Jeff crotches Benoit on the ring post. They get in the ring and trade some pin attempts. Jarrett slaps on a sleeper. Benoit does the Eaton back breaker before nailing the Rolling Reich. It's been a while since he hit all 3. Snap suplex. Creative Control come out. Benoit nearly wins by rolling through a cross body. Diving headbutt. I need a Nazi name for that. Iron Eagle? Creative Control attacked Benoit. Jeff hit the Stroke. The cameras missed it. Dustin Rhodes pulled Jeff out of the ring. He fought with Creative Control and Benoit hit Jeff with his own guitar to win and advance to the finals. A beat down ensues after the match that security eventually broke up. Jeff was busted open from the guitar.
TO THE BACK. Tenay talks to Disco about Disco maybe thinking more about money than his title. Disco wonders how much the title is worth and is then attacked by Jeff Jarrett. The Misfits and Filthy Animals pulled him off.
Disco Inferno vs Evan Karagias WCW Cruiserweight Championship
Disco gets up off the floor with Tony Marinara talking shit. Evan meets him near the entrance and throws him into the ring. Evan is so bad. I have no idea why he was the Power Plant guy WCW decided to really push. He was in great shape, but he looked like a goof, sucked in the ring, and was even worse on the mic. But then again, WCW hired the Harris Brothers and still have Konnan on the roster. Tony hit on Madusa. Evan choked him. Disco tried to hit Evan with a chair and accidentally hit Tony. Evan won with a springboard cross body. New champion. Oh, goodie.
TO THE BACK. Bret Hart arrives.
TO THE POWERS THAT BE. Dr. Claw Russo gives Double J a lot of shit and says he has until the end of the night to prove himself or his favors are over.
TO THE BACK. Gene talks to Norman Smiley about the first ever WCW Hardcore Championship match. Apparently these hardcore matches in the past few weeks have actually been part of a tournament. That means Norman vs Bam Bam was a tournament match for both the WCW Championship and the Hardcore Championship.
Norman Smiley vs Brian Knobs WCW Hardcore Championship
Norman is in hockey goalie gear tonight. Knobs beats the shit out of Norman. Norman comes back with some hockey stick shots. They head backstage. Norman is in charge! Not for long. Where does WCW find all these giant cardboard boxes? They're in a food storage area. They're in an elevator! The finish came when Jimmy accidentally hit Knobs when the door opened. New champion! First ever WCW Hardcore Champion! Knobs beat up Jimmy and Norman after the match.
TO THE BACK. Tenay talks to the Filthy Animals about the upcoming match. Shane has a lot of what ifs. What if...the dinosaurs were still alive, crapping every where like filthy animals? Elsewhere, Gene got to talk with the Animals. Elsewhere elsewhere, Disco tried to convince Tony to forgive him. Tony is calling in da boys. Elsewhere elsewhere elsewhere, Jeff Jarrett and Creative Control are walking with a 2x4.
The Revolution vs The Filthy Animals Elimination Mixed Tag
Eddie and Kidman had no problem punching Asya in the face at the same time. Dean and Saturn got changed awfully fast. Shane is on color. You know, I don't want to disparage Dean Douglas, but I wouldn't be surprised if Shane was injured when he signed his WCW contract, hid it, and then claimed he got injured in a match while wrestling for WCW. All the men took the floor and Torrie teased a dive. The girls cat fight. Kidman did a BK bomb on Asya. Torrie hurt her ankle. Kidman and Eddie checked on her and Kidman was eliminated with a roll up. Kidman was pissed with Eddie over it. Crowd was 1000% behind Eddie. Konnan also left. Good. Fuck Konnan. Delayed suplex from Asya. Dean is eliminated with a rana. Eddie eliminates Asya with a frog splash. Eddie kicked out of the DVD. Eddie taps to the Rings of Saturn, leaving Torrie vs Saturn. She kicked him in the dick. He responds with a low blow of his own and pins her with it. She sold it at first, but then completely stopped once the pin was counted. Saturn is the sole survivor. I'm not sure there are many matches that have ended with a man hitting a woman in the vagina.
TO THE BACK. Jarrett and Creative Control are beating Buff up in the locker room.
Curt Hennig vs Buff Bagwell Retirement Match
Whoever loses must retire. Again, why doesn't TPTB just fire both guys? Double J and Creative Control came out instead of Buff and they attacked Perfect. Buff came out with a 2x4 and ran them off. Loud “Perfect” chants. They brawl around ringside. Crowd is 100% behind Perfect. Too bad I'm not even 20% into this match. I kind of hope they both retire. Buff hasn't had a single good match since the neck injury and in fact he was at his most entertaining while he was recovering and stooging around with Scott Steiner. Hennig hasn't been the same since his own injury in 1991. Buff wins with the Blockbuster and Curt Hennig is forced to retire. He doesn't even get time to embrace the fans or have any kind of moment because....
TO THE BACK. Tenay talks to Sting. Sting never really lost the title, and it's still showtime.
Bret Hart vs Sting Tournament Semi Final
Obviously, Bret is a god in Canada. Lol, the boos for Sting were great. He never got that kind of heat when he was actually a heel. And he's wrestling in a shirt, so it's really just like TNA. These guys had super disappointing matches in 1998. Maybe the super hot Canadian crowd will make it seem better. Sting and Bret are basically the same size. Sting is maybe an inch taller, but he seems much bigger. It's weird. Sting is also wearing pants instead of tights, to make it even more like TNA. I'm so glad Bret never made appearances for TNA. Bret dominates until Sting hits a low blow. Sting misses a Stinger Splash on the announce table. Ref bump. What a surprise. This brings Lex and Liz out. Lex hits Sting in the leg with a bat to a big face pop. Bret hit Lex and put him in the Sharpshooter. The ref called for the bell. Sting is disqualified for pulling the ref in the way of an attack. Bret requested the match to continue and it was allowed. Sting locks on the Scorpion Death Lock. Bret reverses it into the Shaprshooter and advances to the finals. The match was nothing. They shook hands after the match.
TO THE BACK. Gene talks with Chris Benoit about the finals. Benoit considers it an honor to face Bret in Canada. Elsewhere, Tenay talks to Lex, who is already wearing a neck brace. He can't compete tonight.
Berlyn vs Vampiro Chain Match
The only Misfit left is Jerry Only. Fuck the Misfits. This is actually a dog collar match. Oklahoma and Dr. Death came out for this match. VAMPYRO! The very first thing that happens is Berlyn punching the ref. Literally, the very first move was a ref bump. Berlyn instead fights with Jerry Only and Wall has the match in the ring. Wall ends up being the one to put the dog collar on as well. DANNY HODGE! GOD GOOD SOMEBODY STOP THE MATCH! WHO'S YOUR DADDY VAMPRYO!?! Berlyn gets mad when Wall makes a pin, which makes no sense since Berlyn made him wrestle the match in the first place. Wall says fuck it and leaves. Double suplex from Vamp and Jerry. Nail in the Coffin. Neither guy are attached to the chain. Vamp wins with a camel clutch with a chain wrapped around Berlyn's neck. Dr. Death attacked Vamp and Only after the match. You know, Oklahoma wouldn't be that bad if he wasn't making fun of JR's Bell's Palsy. It's actually a very accurate impression. Maybe not the voice, but definitely the verbiage. That's especially clear to me after hearing JR on Austin's podcast.
TO THE BACK. Tenay talks with Scott Hall. Hall apparently was supposed to face Rick Steiner in a title vs title match tonight. But since Rick was put out of action by Sid, Hall was given the TV Championship, so he's now a double champion. Elsewhere, Curt Hennig walks out for the last time. Elsewhere elsewhere, Kim arrives an hour and a half into a PPV. What the fuck. Do wrestling promotions not care about talent being on time for work?
The Total Package vs Meng
Get this shit out of here. Meng sucks. Sorry. He does. All he does is no sell everything and make weird noises. Lex also makes weird noises. So this match is just a bunch of weird noises. Lex wrestles with a neck brace on, which blocks the Tongan death grip. “It's worked, Brain. It's WORKED!” Liz tried to spray Meng with pepper spray. She got Lex. It looked like utter shit. Meng rips the neck brace off and wins with the Tongan Death Grip.
TO THE BACK. Gene talked with Bret about the finals. Bret is going to finally do what he planned when he first came to WCW. Lex randomly walked by during the interview. Elsewhere, David Flair is jerking off his crowbar.
Scott Hall vs Booker T. WCW US/TV Championships
Booker replacing Rick Steiner. I sure don't remember Hall/Steiner being announced in the first place. Both guys are wearing black and white, and one is black and one is white. So deep. The ref is in black and white as well. I can't even handle it. JJ and Creative Control stroll out. Booker hits the ax kick. Jeff distracts the ref. Creative Control got in the ring and distracted Book. Hall hit the Outsider's Edge. Titles retained. The lights go out. IT'S SABU! Midnight saves Booker.
TO THE BACK. Lex hunts for Liz.
David Flair vs Kimberly
Lol, “An obvious SWERVE” is in the video package. Really, Kim brought this on herself. She went out of her way to fuck with David so DDP could fuck with Ric. She was going to drug him and instead got spanked by Ric. David's crazy character has to be one of the best examples of getting the most out of someone with the least amount of talent. Of all time. Not just in WCW or even just Russo related, but in the history of wrestling. Kim did a low blow. David no sold because he apparently had a cup on since he punched himself in the dick. He hit the ref and Kim pretended like she was going to blow him, only to take his cup out and hit him in the face with hit. She then kicked him in the dick again. Then a kick in the head. In the past 4 days, someone has been hit in the face with a cup and a fish. She throttles David until he throws her off. KANYON ran out and saved Kim. Weirdly, they mention that Kanyon was away making Ready to Rumble, just like they did with Goldberg, but they wrote DDP out with an injury. Speaking of DDP, he came out and gave David a Kanyon Cutter. BANG! He was about to hit David with the crowbar when Arn Anderson made the save. Kim and DDP leave, so the match is over. DDP's music hit. David then attacked Arn and ran off. Arn was then attended to by EMTs. Tony talks about Arn not hitting DDP because of his neck injury, but apparently forgot about Arn bumping and doing spinebusters regularly in the first 6 months of the year.
TO THE BACK. Tenay talks to Sid. Sid will never quit.
Sid vs Goldberg I Quit Match
They start right away by trading punches. Godlberg slams Sid and sends him to the floor. It goes back in the ring and Sid does a cobra clutch slam. This feud is weird. Sid basically was building for a match with Goldberg for 2 months on his own, much in the way that Jericho did it. Then they have their match, which was like 6 minutes long and ended in stoppage. Goldberg would challenge Sid to an I Quit match and then Sid turned semi-face and started feuding with Rick Steiner and the Outsiders and this match wasn't even mentioned for 3 weeks. Anyway, two chokeslams in a row. Goldberg gets up and hits a series of short arm lariatooos. Sid apparently dislocates his shoulder. Goldberg puts on a grounded cobra clutch (using the Sid's good arm for some reason). Sid passes out and the ref calls the match. What the fuck? A. It wasn't anywhere near a choke. B. This match was even shorter than the first blood match at Halloween Havoc.
TO THE BACK. Gene talks to Lex. Lex can't find Liz but says she better watch her back tomorrow on Nitro.
Bret Hart vs Chris Benoit WCW Championship Tournament Finals
Weirdly, Benoit had different entrance music than his first match. They both got full, Goldberg style entrances. It's pretty even in the opening moments. Canadian chain wrasslin and hold exchanging. Fans are more into Bret than Benoit. Both guys avoid the other's finishers and shake hands. Corner bump from Bret. A fan jumps the rail and hits Benoit with the Canadian flag. It was Dean Malenko! Completely unnecessary. This was set up earlier when a fan in the same outfit and face paint poked Dean with the flag. So Dean either morphed into him or was that fan the whole time. Piledriver. Benoit comes back with some gnarly chops. Bret hits a DDT. Tombstone from Benoit. He goes up top for the Iron Eagle. He nailed it. The Outsiders came out and pulled the ref out during the pin, but Bret kicked out anyway since Hall missed his cue. Hall slams Benoit. Goldberg runs out and spears Nash. Hall hits Goldberg with a chair and Bret gets rid of Hall. Goldberg fought with the Outsiders near the entrance, which they pay more attention to than the finals of a month long tournament for the vacated championship. Of course. Benoit works over Bret's leg as the fight continues in the back on split screen. Benoit applies a figure four. Bret gets back into it with a back breaker and a superplex. Benoit does the Rolling Reich into a a Dragon suplex, which is countered, which is then countered into the Iron Crossface. Bret counters that into the Sharpshooter. New champion! The finish itself was clean, but the match had 4 run ins and a ref bump for absolutely no reason other than Russo really believing main events need that kind of over booking. If there was ever a time to have a straight match with a clean finish, it would be Benoit vs Hart tournament finals for the title in Canada.
DQ Count: 0 out of 12 matches. However, there was a no contest and only 1 match had no outsider interference or weapons used during the match.
I'd like to give a recap on the tournament. What started at a 32 man tournament turned into a 30 man and 1 woman tournament, with the 1 woman getting to wrestle twice in the opening round. The tournament featured a hardcore match (that was also part of a tournament for the Hardcore Championship that was never actually announced as a tournament), a cage match, and a strap match. DQ Count: 3 Count Out Count: 3 Clean Finish Count: 7. There were also 2 matches that never happened at all due to injuries.
The show it self was pretty bland. Every match besides Goldberg/Sid had run ins or outside interference. And Goldberg/Sid was the second month in a row of Goldberg dominating Sid in a short gimmick match and having the match stopped by a ref. Those finishes didn't keep Sid strong since he was dominated during both matches. Besides the main event, the longest match was just over 10 minutes and that was the 6 person elimination tag. Then there was the dog collar match was under 5 minutes, had Berlyn never put the dog collar on, make Wall put it on, and then got mad at Wall for trying to win the match.