WCW Monday Nitro 2/10/97
Dean Malenko vs Eddie Guerrero
Holy shit, TMF is cutting a promo! He calls Syxx out and has an open challenge for anytime that slimy cunt wants to get taught a lesson in respect. I don't think either title is on the line. I wonder how many matches Eddie and Dean had between 1994 and 1998. At this point, they're extremely familiar with each other and have counters for every counter. Dean goes deep with a spinning head scissors. That dope ass powerslam. Dean's powerslam is definitely in my fave five. Just wonderful. And then a dope release German suplex from TMF. Syxx comes out, wearing the Cruiserweight Championship. He steals the US Championship. Again. Eddie catches up to him and gets counted out. It was fun while it lasted.
DDP comes to the ring with a chair and a microphone. He's got something to say. He's tired of running. I believe he's calling the nWo out. Sting and Macho immediately come out of the stands and into the ring. "Boy, this is odd." Sting and Macho fuck with him for a bit. Sting shoves DDP around with the bat and mimes smashing him in the face with it. He then gives the bat to DDP, and he and Macho turn their backs to him. DDP doesn't hit them. They take the bat and leave.
Bobby Eaton vs Konnan
Fucking Konnan. Shit. Hopefully Eaton gets to throw one of his dope punches, at least. Konnan wins in like 40 seconds. At least it was short.
Ron Powers vs Lex Luger
Is Ron the brother of Jim? Lex has his left wrist in a cast. Before he can make it to the ring, Eric Bischoff runs out and prevents him from competing. Lex goes to the back and as Bischoff is still talking, Giant comes out behind him.
Ron Powers vs The Giant
I'm willing to give Ron Powers a chance based on his cowboy wrestling boots. Giant, of course, quickly demolishes Mr. Powers. Mike Tenay enters the ring to talk with Giant. It appears Giant is going to have to go against The Outsiders on his own at Superbrawl. Giant doesn't give a shit and is convinced Lex will be able to compete. Lex comes back out to answer Giant's one question. That question is, would Lex let anything stop him after all Hall and Nash has put him through? Lex would not. Giant is going to win the titles at Superbrawl, and one of them belongs to Lex.
TO THE BACK. A limo arrives. It's Bubber, Hall, and Nash. They shit on DDP. BUT WHO WAS LIMO?!?!?
High Voltage vs Steiner Brothers
Steiners has a PIP promo talking about their upcoming four corners tag team match at Superbrawl. Again, Scott and Rick are in completely different gear. Harlem Heat are out watching the show. Scott takes a nasty looking chop block, but essentially no sells it and is doing belly to bellies and press slams seconds later. The FoF are also out watching. Tags are made. PE is also out watching. That match will be the first ever four corners tag match. Syxx vs Dean is also going to happen at Superbrawl. You'd think Eddie, as US Champion, would have a title match scheduled before Dean based on hierarchy, but you'd be wrong. Rage tries a springboard thing that Rick turns into a powerbomb. Steiners win with the Steiner Bulldog.
Hall, Nash, Syxx, Bischoff, and Nick Patrick come out. Piper was supposed to come out. They take over the announce booth. I love that Larry doesn't even try to fight them over it and still tries to pretend like he's a bad ass. He just immediately gives his seat up each week, yet acts like he could have kicked the shit out of them if he wanted to. They bring out Randy Anderson, who comes out with his wife and children. Randy asks for his job back. Bischoff says he should have given it a little more thought and asks for the names of the kids. He asks Chase and Montana to come a little closer. "Kids, can you do me a favor? Would you please tell your daddy that he's still fired?" "Hahahahahahah." What a piece of shit. This is more heelish than anything Vince did besides the black wedding thing with Steph. In fact, I think Bischoff was actually a better heel than Vince, in the sense that Vince was so entertaining it was hard to truly hate him, but Bischoff was a legit piece of shit. Eric says Randy can try to get his job back next week if he faces Nick Patrick in a match next week. His wife doesn't want him to, but Randy agrees to the match.
The Outsiders vs THE EXTREME WCW Tag Team Championships
Extreme get their rematch. Oh shit, this week they come out to the Hollywood Blonds/Blitzkrieg music. Outsiders attack during their entrance. Larry is forced to rejoin the commentary booth with Bischoff. He does it because he's a "professional". The Extreme are billed from Stamford, CT, which is just an opportunity to shit on the WWF. Instead of doing the Edge and Jackknife, the Outsiders finish the match with a torture rack and chokeslam. Titles retained. Nash had the rack backwards. Syxx interviews them after the match. They shit all over Giant. Nash is also a giant, but he stopped at the cool stage, while Giant slid on post into the DORK METER.
Rey Mysterio Jr. vs Lord Steven Regal WCW TV Championship
Oh shit. Rey is making his return to action. Plus Regal. Regal is definitely not a face this week. Rey tries to out wrestle Regal, and Regal eats him alive. Rey gets the right idea and uses his speed and flying skillz. There is a particular set of fans in the front row that Regal keeps fucking with. At one point, Regal gets on his knees to mock Rey. A fan totally tries to clothesline Regal. I think he might have popped him. Maybe that was a woman. Regal is so good in this. Rey does his flippy shit and he's just not impressed at all, keeps his cool, and continues fucking Rey up. Rey scores a series of near falls. The bell rings during a pin. Time limit draw. Title retained. Although it wasn't 10 minutes unless you count entrances. A ton of fun, though. I would love to see them get 15 minutes on PPV or something.
Taskmaster vs Maverick Wild
As you can imagined based on the name of the jobber, this is a quick smash. Jackie knocked the shit out of him on the floor, then Kevin smashed him in the ring.
TO THE TENAY. Kevin Sullivan is SHOOTING. This isn't wrestling. This is real life. Now he's talking about "Paulie" calling him late at night. The deal's gone south. Lmao at trying to use Paul E. for this worked shoot angle that no one understands or cares about at this point. It's all about DO YER JOB. Now he's been talking about their wedding night, biting noses off, pulling out guns. What the fuck is going on here. "It's Kevin right now tonight." HE'S SHOOTING. HE SHOOTING. No one in the audience has a clue what any of this shit is about.
The Piper/Hogan stuff from last week is replayed.
Hugh Morrus vs Alex Wright
Hugh wins with the moonsault in a quick match. Both guys had an edge to them, but fuck Hugh Morrus.
Chris Benoit/Steve McMichael vs Jeff Jarrett/Chavo Guerrero Jr.
Benoit is legit shook after that legit shoot from Sullivan. Benoit and Chavo begin. Benoit is getting smashed here. Mongo tags in and starts wrecking Jeff. Still not over that cucking. Debra checks on Jeff on the floor. I think it's mostly about his gear being torn or something. Mongo murders Chavo with a tombstone for the win.
TO THE MEAN BY GOD TENAY. Flair and Arn come out to join the party. Arn SHOOTS on reasonable men and perfect marriages. Benoit also SHOOTS, telling Sullivan from the heart to STICK IT. He's sick and tired of all this shit. So much SHOOTING. I love that Mongo always goes for cheap heel heat when the Horsemen are really faces. Mongo wants an answer about all this Debra/JJ shit. She wants him to be a Four Horsemen. Mongo challenges Jarrett to a match at Superbrawl, I believe either giving up his spot if he loses, or at least letting Jeff join the Horsemen.
Roddy Piper comes to the ring. Hogan is live via satellite to respond. He made a promise to his boy that he was giving it all away, but that bald headed geek Hogan ruined all of his plans. Piper starts crying and scratching his head a bunch. EMOTIONS. Piper makes gay jokes about Hogan and Bischoff. Colt gave Piper a license to kill, and Hulk's the target. Hulk calls Piper a pussy again for hiding behind his kid. And that's that.
This Piper thing still feels so disconnected from the rest of the show. He only shows up for a few minutes at the end of the show, only interacts with Hogan and Bischoff and sometimes the B Team. It just feels off. This was a fun show, though. Rey/Regal especially was a blast and the reason it was always worth it to tune into Nitro. That's the kind of match that WWF could never have, because they didn't have that kind of talent or would put on that style of match. It was so fun. Loved it. Eddie/Dean was fun. Steiners/High Voltage was kind of fun. There is definitely more good than bad from week to week on most Nitros. Superbrawl has six matches announced and it is still two weeks away.