WCW Monday Nitro 5/13/96
6 days away from Slamboree, will Lex finally make it to the ring for his title shot? To make sure he'd make it, he camped out in front of the arena last night.
Steiner Brothers vs Public Enemy
PE gave the Steiners a surprising amount of trouble a few weeks ago. Let's see how it turns out this time. We're told Macho has been banned from the building tonight, but he is outside. Scott and Rocco begin. Press slam. Double Steinerline. Tags are made. Powerslam to Grunge. Like Grunge would be doing a leap frog. Come on. Grunge saves Rocco from a superplex with an electric chair on Scott. In ring Drive By. Eric uses centrifugal force TWICE in one sentence, trying to sound smart. Starting on 5/27, Nitro goes to 2 hours. Frankensteiner for the win.
Dave Taylor vs Chris Benoit
Benoit got a hair cut. It was not a good one. The Horsemen have disbanded, and Benoit blames Kevin Sullivan for it. Stiff uppercuts from Taylor. Lol at Benoit trying to be all flashy with leap frogs and drop downs and Taylor just stepping on his face. HI HULK HOGAN I WISH YOU LUCK FOR YOUR FRIEND SHAQ IN THE PLAYOFFS! Bischoff has been giving shout outs to Hulk each week, but there is no reason given as to why Hulk has been gone. DDP has replaced Bobby Walker in the LL. Dope fall away slam from Taylor. Mongo leaves to go talk to Savage. Benoit wins with a dragon suplex.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Gene is outside with a host of security to talk to Macho Man, who is not allowed in the building. Mongo arrives because he knows more than anyone else what Macho is going through. He's got a plan! He also called Flair, "Darling". "I'll talk to you in another life time, but not this one!" A lot of mic issues, both with Gene and the announcers. "Don't tell me where I'm going, cuz you don't know where I've been!" He doesn't mind dragging a dead tag team partner to the ring. "I saw a woman psychiatrist, yeah and she said I was an OCD: One Cool Dude!" What a line.
GLAICER HYPE VIDEO!
VK Wallstreet vs Ric Flair
What a random ass match. I can't think of what IRS has done to deserve a match with Ric Flair. I'm not sure if he's been on Nitro all year. IRS. In 1996. I wonder what Bo and Bray were doing in 1996. Pouring water on themselves, probably. IRS has completely dominated the match. He had the win with a Samoan drop if Woman hadn't put Flair's foot on the ropes. IRS makes the mistake of trying a HINEY while Flair was against the ring post. Figure four with leverage for the win. What a weird match for Flair to have in the first place, but weirder to have such a hard time with IRS, who hasn't done ANYTHING in WCW since coming back.
TO THE MEAN BY GOD GENE. Gene gets words with Flair at the VIP table. I think he said he raped Dolly Parton. Wtf. When Mongo is brought up, Flair compares himself to Joe Namath and calls Woman and Liz his wide receivers.
The Giant vs Lex Luger WCW Championship
Jobber entrances for the title match? Bischoff apologizes for the Flair's language in the last segment. It was quite a line. Only Flair could say something like that. Lex bounces off Giant repeatedly. Giant in there doing Oklahoma Stampedes. The running forearm (which Bischoff points out knocked Yoko out for 10 minutes not long ago (3 years ago is a while ago to me)) doesn't phase Giant. Lex gets chokeslammed through the VIP table. The match is thrown out. Jimmy Hart tries to pull Giant off. Sting shows up to protect Lex. Medics and trainers tend to Lex. Bischoff has his Owen Voice on and eventually the announcers drop out completely during the replays. All you can here is the ambient crowd noise for a while. I love the subtext here of Bischoff being super upset and worried when a top guy goes through a table, but making jokes when low card guys like PE and the American Males go through tables.
Announced card for Slamboree: The Lethal Lottery:
- Sting vs The Giant WCW Championship
- Animal/Booker T vs Hawk/Lex Luger
- Public Enemy vs Chris Benoit/Kevin Sullivan
- Rick Steiner/ASSHOLE MAN vs Scott Steiner/Craig Pittman
- VK Wallstreet/Jim DOOGUN vs Blue Bloods
- Dick Slater/Robert Eaton vs Disco Inferno/Alex Wright
- DDP/Barbarian vs Meng/Hugh Morrus
- Fire & Ice vs Big Bubba Rogers/Stevie Ray
- Ric Flair/Randy Savage vs Arn Anderson/Eddie Guerrero
- Shinjiro Otani defends the WCW Cruiserweight Championship