WCW Monday Nitro 8/26/96
Will the nWo answer the challenge for War Games?
Juventud Guerrera vs Billy Kidman
Oh no. On one hand, this is Juvi's debut. On the other hand, the 700 matches these two had in 1998 make me nervous. They quickly head to the floor. Kidman's hair cut is so bad. Juvi does the most awkward victory roll into a rana into a sunset flip bomb off the apron. So much trouble getting to that spot. He follows it with a pescado leg drop. Springboard corkscrew splash back into the ring. Tony has been taking notes from Tenay and has all the names for all the moves. Konnan injured Hypnosis, so Juvi will fill in for him and face Konnan at Fall Brawl. Kidman connects with the SSP. Juvi kicks out. Kidman goes back up and gets caught with a super victory roll into a rana.
TO THE JUICY GENE. Lol, Juvi was barely comprehensible after 4 years of wrestling in the US. Having him do a promo his first match in seems questionable at best. "I am the best wrestler Mexican!" No idea what anything else was.
GLACIER YOU FUCKING CUNT.
We're shown Sting and Lex offering to team with Arn and Flair against the nWo in War Games.
Marcus Bagwell/Jim Powers vs Big Bubber/The Taskmaster
Powers is filling in for an injured Riggs. Sullivan immediately attacks Powers. He's also completely dropped all trappings of the Taskmaster gimmick. In fact, his trunks and boots both say KS again. No face paint, no red and yellow. I don't know why they don't just call him Kevin Sullivan full time again. Bubber catches Buff in a powerbomb. Tree of Keanu. Buff gets a "hot" tag to Jim Powers. As much as a tag to Jim Powers can be hot. Powers gets a 3 count on a cross body. Bubber's shoulder was up questionably close. The Males music started, but Patrick had restarted the match. Boss Man Slam gets the win. Teddy Long gets all up in Nick's face over the call.
TO THE MEAN GENE. This is proof to Bubber that he should be getting all the title shots. Then he says he's fucking sick of all the Glacier promos. Me too, Bubber. Me too. Sullivan claims that he saw Gene in a boat with Hogan a week ago. Gene said that was Eric Bischoff.
TO THE MEAN GENE. After the break, Gene was in the back with Lex and Sting. Even though they are teaming with Arn and Flair at Fall Brawl, they will be facing Mongo and Benoit tonight. Seems like a poor choice for Arn and Flair to allow that. Sting takes this as Ric and Arn not trusting the fortitude of Lex and Sting.
Mike Enos vs Chavo Guerrero Jr
Dick Slater comes out a few minutes into the match. Konnan is dressed as a cholo, being "incognito" in the audience. You know, being incognito by drawing a ton of attention to yourself. Enos fucks up a powerbomb and Chavo lands on his knee. Chavo then locks on a figure four. Randy Anderson accidentally gets poked in the eye. Slater broke the hold and took Enos' place, and then lost to a small package.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Chavo calls out DDP. DDP should give him a Kanyon Cutter off of one of the W's. Chavo will face DDP at Fall Brawl.
JL vs Rey Mysterio Jr WCW Cruiserweight Championship
I figured JL was done. His music is way too dope for him. We're getting word that Hulk Hogan is outside.
TO THE BACK. The nWo is outback. They spray paint a Turner production truck. 4LIFE.
The match had understandably been apparently slow and uninteresting while all of this was going on. TMF comes out and stares. This match is weird. Jerry's top has ripped and they take turns getting into referee position to do amateur stuff.
HOUR TWO BALLYHOO
Wrap this shit up. Completely uninteresting and unengaging match. Rey gets the win with the West Coast Pop. Title retained.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Mongo, Benoit, and the yaks are guests in the back. Mongo feels they made a bad decision to let Sting and Lex take their place in War Games. Benoit doesn't really see it that way and instead wants to make sure Sting and Lex have the edge they (Mongo and Benoit) think they've lost.
We'reshown footage of Hulk hitting Macho with a chair 2 weeks ago and Macho's response last week.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Gene speaks with Macho in the back. Macho will face Hogan for the title at Halloween Havoc. "I don't care if you care! I'm in the zone, BUDDY!"
Jim DOOGUN vs The Giant
I hope Giant kills Duggan instead of taking 10 minutes and barely being able to finish it. Duggan should try to cheat with the tape, Giant no sells it, and chokeslams him. But that isn't what happens. Brain doesn't think Giant can chokeslam Duggan. Even though Giant has chokeslammed Duggan before, and he's chokeslammed bigger guys with no problems. A commotion starts in the crowd. It's Ted DiBiase walking through the crowd! Duggan wraps his fist. The punches don't put Giant down. Duggan and Jimmy fight over the board, which allows Giant to hit the chokeslam for the win. Ted counts to 4 and says 5 will happen next week. Giant still had more trouble with Duggan than anyone besides Hogan in the last 8 months. No idea why they booked Duggan so strong.
TO THE MEAN AUUUUUUURUAAHGHGHAUAUARGHGH. Giant is pissed that Macho would dare blame Giant for letting WCW down and losing the title when Macho wasn't even at Hog Wild. He's going to take Macho's title shot. Gene has to wipe down the camera and mic after Giant spits everywhere.
Rock N Roll Express vs Ric Flair/Arn Anderson
Fuck, Bischoff has been saying that DiBiase could be the newest member of the Horsemen. Then he finally calms down and says..."Wait...I just thought of something..." and soberly posits that Ted is the 4th member of the nWo and the 5th member will be here next week. NO SHIT SHERLOCK. Not only that, that was Brain's immediate reaction. This is exactly the same as their match a few months ago, but with MUCH less heat. This crowd has really sucked all night, though. Arn hit a DDT on Morton and Ric got the pin.
TO THE MEAN BY GOD GENE. The sand is running out on the nWo, friends. War Games will take place in Horsemen country.
GLAICER IS A LOW DOWN YELLOW BELLIED EGG SUCKING DOG.
Chris Jericho vs Alex Wright
Jericho's WCW debut. INDIE RESPECK to start the match. Jericho hits the triangle dropkick. Obviously, no one knows who the fuck Jericho is, so they are pretty silent. I mean, they were quiet for Flair and Arn. Alex does a dive and hits the guard rail. The ref counts Alex out, but Jericho doesn't want to win that way, so the match ends as a no contest. What a lame debut.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Gene talks with Alex and Jericho. Jericho came here to fight to the best of his ability, and to win that way is not fighting to the best of his ability. Jericho takes shots at Hogan and the nWo and Alex doesn't even get to speak.
Steiner Brothers vs Blue Bloods
Jobber entrances. Something must have gone long tonight. Eaton and Taylor argue over who is going to start first. Eaton doesn't want to start the match. Eaton and Rick end up starting. The Bloods attempt a Doomsday Device cross body. Rick keeps rotating into a powerslam thing for the win. Scott never got in the ring, which wasn't surprising since he wasn't wearing knee pads. The BB fought after the match.
TO THE MEAN GENE. The Steiners get a title shot at Fall Brawl. Rick is going to be "Beaner Beaner, the pumpkin eater." Scott does an impression of a rooster.
Chris Benoit/Steve McMichael vs Sting/Lex Luger
The Horsemen jump Sting before Lex can get in the ring. A lot of general brawling before it settles into Lex as FIP. Hot tag to Sting. The crowd reacts to something else, though. All the fans with their backs to the hard cam are turns around. HOGAN IS HERE! He goes after Mongo, who saw him coming. Hulk backs off. Hall and Nash come out of the crowd on the other time and blast Mongo. Mongo has been spray painted. Benoit takes the Outsider's Edge while Sting gets jackknifed. Both men are also spray painted. Arn and Flair hit the ring. They gets sprayed IN THE FACE. Flair then gets his hair spray painted. The cups and bottles fly into the ring. They then take over the announce table. Hulk paints the logo and it seems like their mics are cut.
Definitely a better show than last week, even if the matches weren't that interesting. It's amazing how for 6 months, shows without Hogan were instantly better, but now shows without him feel small time. The shows feel incomplete without the nWo making an appearance. And it was quite the appearance tonight. Spray painting Turner trucks and wrestlers for the first time. DiBiase debuts and teases a 5th guy for next week. Bischoff positing that he was a new member of the Horsemen was the dumbest shit, even if you know Bischoff has been nWo the whole time. Who the fuck is going to believe that another WWF guy coming down through the crowd, who has been retired for 3 years and obviously not in wrestling shape, is the newest member of the Horsemen when we've been hearing about a 4th nWo for a month now? The same Horsemen that just reformed to full force recently and are called the FOUR Horsemen for a reason. Obviously, Ted is involved in the nWo and a 5th guy will be there next week.