WWE vs ECW 6/7/06

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Days before One Night Stand and week before the debut of ECW's new weekly program, Raw and Smackdown combine to battle their extreme counterparts.

TO THE BACK. Mick Foley hypes up the Raw and SD rosters. Elsewhere, Paul Heyman hypes up his EXTREMISTS.

The last time two opposing brands teamed up together to fend off ECW, the Alliance was formed. Just saying. Tensions between announce teams immediately boils over into Tazz and Jerry Lawler having to be held back by JR and Joey Styles.

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Rey Mysterio vs Rob Van Dan

Rey is the World Heavyweight Champion coming into this, but this is a non-title match. He'll be facing Sabu at One Night Stand for the title. RVD will be cashing in his MITB briefcase against John Cena at ONS, and later tonight, Cena faces Sabu. Oh my god (no pun intended), this announce team bickering shit is THE WORST. Fans here are pretty firmly on RVD's side. Lots of flippies, rollies, and jumpies. I guess this is extreme rules since the ref is allowing chairs and crowd dives and whatnot. The number one contender to the WWE Championship pins the World Heavyweight Champion 100% clean in under 10 minutes. 

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TO THE BACK. Kurt Angle heads to the ring.

Kurt Angle comes to the ring to talk some shit about Randy Orton. This, of course, brings Orton out. "You went from headlining, main eventing Wrestlemania to...ECW. It's like the equivalent of starring in a summer blockbuster, then going to hardcore porn." Orton reveals that he's now on Raw and will be facing Kurt at ONS. 

TO THE BACK. Mickie James and Jazz head to the ring. 

Mickie James vs Jazz

I hate Joey Styles. I hate Tazz. I hate King. At least JR is staying out of all this shit. While they're arguing nonstop, they're ignoring that the WWE Women's Champion is getting dominated by Jazz, an ECW wrestler, where there isn't even a women's division. Mickie's only offense was a thumb to the eye and the DDT.

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TO THE TODD. Todd Grisham speaks with WWE Champion John Cena. Cena cuts a promo invoking the names of Bruno, Austin, and Hogan, saying that if he loses the title at ONS, their legacy is gone. "Sabu, I fear no one. I regret nothing. So you homicidal, genocidal, suicidal, dance recital sheik of the week, understand that you have now officially pissed off the wrong fire breathing SON OF A BITCH!" 

Paul Heyman comes to the ring. Tazz and Joey ogle Lillian Garcia. "Hey King, shouldn't you be at the senior prom tonight?" Paul hypes up the debut of ECW on Sci-Fi next week, then runs down the card for ONS.

TO THE BACK. Kurt Angle hypes up the ECW locker room. Elsewhere, Big Show talks about Kurt being a sell out and a traitor to WWE.

WWE vs ECW Battle Royal

Fucking Tatanka. Lmao. I always forget his SD run. Terry Funk out here eliminating guys in 2006. Loooool Sandman eliminated Carlito with a dropkick. Things come down to Kurt vs Show/Orton/Shelton/Finlay/Edge. Kurt eliminates Shelton, Finlay, and Edge. Orton eliminates Kurt. WWE WINS! But wait, Big Show reveals an ECW shirt. SWERVE! ECW wins! 

TO THE BACK. Show celebrates with the ECW locker room, many of which Show just beat the shit out of.

Edge vs Tommy Dreamer Extreme Rules

Edge has Foley and Lita in his corner. Dreamer has Terry Funk. Edge had an old Cactus Jack promo shitting on ECW and hardcore wrestling cued up. Street signs and cookie sheets. EXTREME! This is very bad. God damn, between Tazz/King/Joey bitching at each other, and Tommy Dreamer being Tommy Dreamer, this sucks. At some point, Tazz and Joey start bitching at JR for NOT bitching all night, and then JR gets pissed, too. Edge takes a HORRIBLE bump getting back dropped off the top rope on to a table, but he just landed on his head and kind of grazed the table with his hip. Tommy tried to powerbomb Lita. Edge speared him and pinned him while Lita sat on Tommy's face. Funk and Foley were punching each other out on the floor this whole time, with Funk having barbed wire wrapped around his neck and Terry trying to bust Mick open hardway. It works, eventually.

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After the break, Foley, busted open and with a big mouse under his eye, cuts a classic Cactus Jack promo in the middle of the ring under a spotlight, chastising the fans for calling him a sell out and a WHORE. It's about ECW being the girl you can't let go of, but makes you sick to look at. What he and Edge will do at One Night Stand will be the most violent thing he's ever done, to finally exercise himself of the demon of ECW. This is probably the last great Mick Foley promo.

King and Tazz again start arguing. "I've got more wrestling ability in one of my farts than you got in your entire body." "You know what, big mouth? Why don't you show me." "I'll show you right now, asshole." And with that, King and Tazz beat the shit out of each other. There's more action and intensity in this than their actual match at ONS. Joey knocks off JR's hat and it sure looked like JR was about to beat his ass for it but they immediately cut to a break.  

Sabu vs John Cena Extreme Rules

A dream match. Lmao, Tazz is so fucking winded, drenched in sweat. Meanwhile, King, who is a good 18 years older than Tazz, is completely fine. If there was one good thing to come out of WWE ECW, it's definitely that SABU VS JOHN CENA actually happened. Cena starts out hot and heavy, controlling the match until Sabu hits a low blow. Then the chair comes out. Will Sabu spike John Cena? Sabu just out here doing Sabu things to John Cena. What a world. And then Cena hits the FU and has Sabu about to tap out to the STF, only for the ring to fill up with both rosters, and a big brawl breaks out. Of course. WE'RE OUTTA TIME! 

What a mess of a show. Portraying ECW as its on thing fighting against WWE when all those guys are going to be killing each other on Tuesday nights is dumb. The nonstop arguing between the announcers all show was MISERABLE. Jesus fucking Christ. To hype up ONS, which has both the WWE and World Heavyweight Championships being defended, the number one contender to the WWE Championship 100% cleanly defeats the WHC without really that much of a fight, and the number one contender to the WHC gets defeated by the WWE Champion.  On top of that, the WHC champ was in the opener, WWE champ was in the main event. Except for RVD, already very established in WWE, all the ECW dudes were portrayed as second rate scrubs. Sounds like a great way to promote the new ECW show.