TO THE BACK. A sweaty Paul Heyman has booked himself in a match against SABU! Lmao. You could say he's gonna kill his own creation.
Rob Van Dam vs Hardcore Holly
Heyman had convinced Bob that RVD was talking mad shit about him. That's why RVD was attacked last week. And let me tell you, Hardcore is stiff as fuck. Bordering on wtf stiff at times. Bob brought a chair into the ring, but it was used against him and he was knocked into the crowd.
TO THE BACK. Rene Dupree gets his pump and cardio on at the same time.
The Big Show comes to the ring and invites DX to ECW next week.
TO THE REJECT. "Fight the power." You can fight these hands, breh.
CM Punk vs Steven Richards
Probably not great for your career when Stevie Richards is bigger and more cut than you. I mean, Punk never main evented WM. That's probably the reason. Stevie got a lot more offense than CW and Justin, and Punk opens up some more of his trademark indie war crate. Another win with the anaconda vise. Pretty fun little TV match. Punk is picking up a lot of steam.
TO THE CLASSROOM. "If he's so smart, why's his tie so short?" Mr. Striker is in the ring to give a lesson. he talks down to the fans and ECW talent for a while until Sandman comes out. Lmao, he was waiting for it and hit Sandman with THE BLACKBOARD. And then a stapler.
TO THE BALLS. Kelly Kelly joins him and flashes Balls.
Joey Styles and Kurt Angle talk about Kurt Angle's unconditional release from WWE. They both wish him well. "One day, maybe we'll see Kurt back in the ring where he belongs."
Paul Heyman vs Sabu EXTREME RULES
Of course, Heyman's security immediately beat on Sabu. Sabu fights back, and then randomly dives over the ropes, where Show was standing off camera. Show caught him, but Sabu hit a DDT. Security and Show beat his ass. Lmao at Heyman slapping the shit out of Sabu while talking mad shit. Sabu makes some briefest of comebacks with Show, but they're all ineffective. RVD comes out to even up the odds. Sabu finally gets his hands on Paul Heyman. Just as Sabu was about to put Paul through a table, Show speared him out of the air. Hardcore Holly shows up and hits RVD with an Alabama Slam through the table. Paul Heyman pins Sabu. Looooooooooool. After the match, Show chokeslams Sabu through a table and then does a whole lot of suck its.
Truly a fuckery main event befitting ECW.