Ditch Decades 7

The Funk Brothers vs Abdullah the Butcher/The Sheik AJPW 12/15/77

We'll see how this goes.  This is about as big of a styles clash as possible.  Abby and Sheik are...not good wrestlers.  I don't think either knows how to actually wrestle.  But they are wild characters and ready to stab a bitch at any moment.  The bros attack as the heels hit the ring.  Dory in particularly seems FIRED UP.  Sheik is already bleeding, which isn't surprising at all.  I think he had bladed before he even came to the ring.  Abby is also bleeding.  Dory is fucking both guys up.  Dropping tons of elbows on Abby.  Sheik comes in and I think has a garote and tries to kill Dorry.  Terry is throwing headbutts on Abby and now Dorry is choking Sheik with wrist tape.  The Funks are out brawling the guys who are ONLY known for brawling and stabbing.  Abby with the Sudanese Elbow.  2 count.  Suplex to Abby.  I swear Abby bladed more after a double atomic drop.  Sheik gets his pencil out and tries to rip Terry's arm apart.  CZW!  And it works, as Terry's arm has been shredded open.  It's gross.  There aren't any close shots of the stabbing or the cuts though.  Dory gets the pencil and Sheik does some Flair level blatantly blading.  Terry comes back to the ring after having his arms taped up.  But the bandages are torn and bloody, so he looks like some weird mummy coming in the ring to throw stiff punches.  The ref gets stabbed and Funks win via disqualification.  Obviously the fight continues and the ring fills up trying to keep them apart.  In the middle of this wild pull apart, Dory is doing arm drags and shit.  The heels are finally driven out and Terry's arm is attended to.  I guess by standards of an Abby/Sheik match, this was pretty good.  The real story is how this match made Terry one of the most over babyfaces in Japan.  What's really weird is that Dory seemed more fired up and ready to fight than Terry, but Terry was the one getting carved up and selling by screaming, crying, and bleeding for our sins.

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Tatsumi Fujinami vs Akira Maeda NJPW 6/12/86

This was at probably the height of the UWF/NJPW invasion angle.  Code of Honor is followed, which seems kind of strange for a heated invasion angle.  Fujinami throws the first leg strike.  Maeda takes it to the mat and gets an arm bar on for a while.  Dragon breaks it only to be caught in a heel hook.  SHOOT dropkick!  Maeda misses a flying wheel kick and gets hit with a lariatoooo before getting trapped in a half crab.  Fans are super into this.  I don't know what they keep chanting, but whatever it is is loud.  Maeda goes back to the leg lock.  Rope break.  Maeda reapplies the hold and is forced to break.  Stiff leg kicks.  Knee bar.  Rope break.  Boot to the face!  Head kicks.  Dragon is down in the corner.  Standing 8 count for Fujinami.  He's up, but dazed.  More head kicks.  Scorpion death lock is attempted.  Rope break and then they roll to the floor.  Maeda don't want none out there.  He kicks the fuck out of Fujinami's face back in the ring.  Repeatedly.  Just blasting him.  Rude as shit.  Triangle.  Dragon gets out and applies a bow and arrow.  Maeda quickly breaks it.  Piledriver!  Maeda gives a real dick head break, slapping Fujinami while getting off of him.  Another big kick rush, alternating between the legs and the head.  Dragon makes it up before 10 and is put in a rear chin lock.  Another series of head kicks, including one that hit flush in the mouth.  Back to the arm bar.  Fujinami is finally able to counter a kick with a leg sweep, but it doesn't last long before he's kick in the head again.  Maeda blocks a dragon suplex.  Fujinami tries one, which is countered into a Fujiwara arm bar.  Rope break.  Dragon just will not quick, despite getting the shit knocked out of him.  German suplex OUTTA NOWHERE gets a 2 count.  Fans are so hot.  Maeda finally eats a big kick that sends him down.  Capture suplex.  Back to the knee bar.  I think you're going to have to knock Fujinami out for him to lose.  Both go over the top on a hip toss.  Scorpion death lock!  Maeda hits a koppo kick in the corner that immediately busts Fujinami open on the side of his orbital socket.  Moments later, neither man can answer the 10 count, but Fujinami was bleeding like crazy.  It didn't even initially look like the kick landed well, but Fujinami was immediately bleeding and by the time it ended about 90 seconds later, the whole side of his face and neck were covered and his eye was almost swollen shut.  This match won the best bout award from Tokyo Sports that year.  It was pretty good.  Fujinami took a beating, but wouldn't stay down.  Fans were so hot for it.  So many head kicks.  In 1987, Maeda would do that same kick for real in a match to Riki Choshu, which would break Choshu's orbital socket and get Maeda fired.  In the UWF, he had a match with Tiger Mask that turned into a real shoot and Maeda hit legit low blow that made Tiger Mask quit the UWF and wrestling in general for over a decade.  What I'm saying is that Maeda was kind of a cunt.

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Black Tiger II vs Jushin Liger Best of Super Juniors Finals NJPW 6/12/96

AY YO, gimmie dat Eddie.  Opening exchange on the mat ends in a stalemate and a stand off, but no RESPECK to be found.  Eddie as Black Tiger was a lot meaner than he was as Eddie.  Even as heel Eddie.  Liger breaks a camel clutch by sending Eddie to the floor.  Eddie waits out there and begs Liger to try a dive just so he can move.  Liger doesn't fall for it.  Eddie does a dope pop up rana.  Low drop kick and Eddie goes right to work on that knee, including laying it out over the apron and doing a pescado on it.  Eddie locks in a figure four.  Liger reverses it.  I wonder at what point the reversal became an offensive move.  In the 60s and 70s, in Japan at least, reversing the hold did nothing to the performer of the hold.  Had to happen sometime in the 80s, but I don't know when, where, or why.  Romero Special from Liger.  Tiltawirl back breaker.  Fuck yo tiger.  Eddie doesn't fuck around on offense.  He stays all over you.  Much like Stunning Steve or Stan Hansen would do.  ALWAYS on you and you better not blow up.  Koppo kick in the corner.  Eddie goes up top, gets hit with a palm strike that sends him to the floor, and Liger comes off the top with a splash.  Which the camera man missed and instead looked at the ring post.  Huge powerbomb in the ring.  Brainbustaaaaa.  2 count.  Eddie gets out of the next one, sends Liger to the floor, and misses a pescado.  He kind of landed on his feet and slams Liger out in the crowd and comes off with a give from the top rope, just past the guard rail.  They head into what seems like a finish stretch, with a lot of roll ups and bombs from Liger.  He can't put Eddie away, even after a fisherman buster and Liger Bomb.  Eddie blocks a tornado DDT and gives a brainbustaaaa, wagging his finger at Liger.  BT Bomb!  2 count.  Liger falls on top of Eddie during an attempted avalanche brainbuster.  Eddie wins moments later by connecting with a nasty avalanche brainbustaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.  

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Danshoku Dino/Muscle Sakai/YOSHIHIKO vs Poison Sawada JULIE/Inokuma/Akiomi Nitta DDT 2/25/05

Thought I'd get weird in this set.  I don't really know who any of these people are besides Dino and I know of Julie from Fire Pro Returns.  All I know is that DDT is fucking weird so lets see what happens.  It starts with a video that has people looking in their walets, a guy getting shot with an assault rifle, a blow up doll doing a 360 rana, and other such weirdness.  JULIE is a dude who wears a giant snake head with the Infinity Stones on it and appears to have mind control over his team mates and fans alike.  Dino is violently gay.  Nitta is a real kickboxer and has about 45 abs.  YOSHIHIKO is the blow up doll.  

 

Dino and JULIE start out.  Tags are made and YOSHI comes in with a big springboard dive that is caught with a dropkick.  Inokuma is going to town on YOSHI.  Kimura!  He's going to break the arm, damn it.  Oh shit, YOSHI gets a deep head scissors in.  Inokuma is able to do some 70s NWA spots with YOSHI.  Nitta tags in and kicks through YOSHI right into his own partner's leg.  He unleashes a flurry of strikes on YOSHI, who is able to make it up before 10 and tag out to Dino.  I have no idea what's going on here.  I think Sakai is dead after getting shot in the gut before the match.  Wait.  HE'S ALIVE!  MY GOD!  JULIE and Dino are fighting on the stage, Sakai and Nitta are fighting in the ring, Inokuma and YOSHI have gone outside I think.  Oh, they're fighting on the balcony.  NO, YOU'RE GOING TO KILL YOSHI!  A lady attacks Inokuma and saves YOSHI.  Balcony dive!  ECW ECW ECW ECW ECW ECW!  I guess Nitta has spent the last few minutes beating up a photographer.  And now Sakai has his MOOEY TIE gloves.  Dino humps and molests Nitta, then gives him a very long and passionate kiss that wears both men out.  I don't know where the line of Fun and Playful can be crossed into something bad.  Mostly because only 2 of the 6 involved look like they were trained to wrestle at all.  Dino hits the SHINING DICK!  Huge tornado DDT from YOSHI.  Or maybe not.  Hard to tell sometimes.  YOSHIHIKO gets the win with an inverted Yoshi Tonic.

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Fucking weird ass selction.  From 70s brawling to 80s shoot style to 90s juniors to 00s whateverthefuckthatwas.  Watch Maeda/Fujinami.  Eddie/Liger was good, but didn't seem to have a lot of focus in the actual moves being done.  If you're into weird Japanese comedy, the DDT match is probably great.

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